Are you really having an affair?

30th May 2018By Deborah Sadleraffairs, Issues, Relationships, Therapy

Micro-cheating is the latest word to describe infidelity and poses the question: are you really having an affair?  And if you’re not really having an affair, is your behaviour such that it is leading up to one? As a relationship therapist a large proportion of my work is helping clients deal with the, often destructive, … Read More

Taking the long view for better mental health

26th June 2017By Deborah SadlerTherapy

Taking the long view is ultimately better for mental health as ‘We Aren’t Built to Live in the Moment’.  This excellent article by Martin Seligman and John Tierney argues that we are not prisoners of the present and the past because we are able to  imagine and shape our futures.  In doing so we can … Read More

Rejection is Helpful

28th March 2017By Deborah SadlerTherapy

Viewing rejection as helpful is not a perspective that readily springs to mind.  This article, which was on the opinion page of the Guardian some time ago, is worth a read.  It concludes with the statement: “A rejection doesn’t mean you failed. It means you tried. Try again“.

Take the plunge

14th December 2016By Deborah SadlerTherapy

Take the plunge, make the big change, say no to the status quo-a new year is about to begin! Fear breeds inertia, whereas taking risks will boost your confidence and forward momentum, Oliver Burkeman says. To new clients: I now work online via zoom.  Yes, I made a big change!  True that it’s at a … Read More

Don’t Break the Chain

8th January 2015By Deborah SadlerChange, Choices, Solutions, Therapy

Happy new year. Don’t break the chain: I thought you may be interested in this idea of inch by inch progress.  It was advice given by Jerry Seinfeld to a comic who was asking for tips on how to make it in the industry.  I was struck by how well it fits with the solution-focused approach … Read More

Work-Life Balance

4th August 2014By Deborah SadlerChoices, Solutions, Therapy, Work

Work-life balance is a frequent topic of concern raised by clients in therapy sessions.  This is an excellent article which asks if the work-life balance is a myth.  It puts forward a different way of considering the subject.