Micro-cheating is the latest word to describe infidelity and poses the question: are you really having an affair? And if you’re not really having an affair, is your behaviour such that it is leading up to one? As a relationship therapist a large proportion of my work is helping clients deal with the, often destructive, … Read More
Relationships
Affairs – Couples Counselling Online
I see many couples online whose relationship is in trouble following an affair. Often these couples are unsure if they want to continue with the relationship. They’re not sure if or how trust can be rebuilt. Those who decide to split up often need help figuring out how to end the relationship, while still co-parenting … Read More
Parenting Skills – a work in progress
It’s something of a relief to read that others out there in the world consider their parenting skills as a ‘work in progress’. Enjoy!
How to stay married by embracing change
To Stay Married, Embrace Change. Embracing change is the key to staying married, so writes Ada Calhoun (The New York Times, 21st April 2017). Her excellent article cites lack of change as the most common reason for divorce. Solution focused therapy helping towards change Using solution-focused therapy I work (online) with many couples who are struggling … Read More
Finding Solutions to Problems – Online
Finding Solutions to problems online in solution-focused therapy When it comes to finding solutions there is no one-size-fits-all. I work with clients online. Over the course of their therapy sessions with me clients are able to find solutions to their problems that are realistic, and because their solutions fit with their lives they are easier … Read More
What makes relationships work?
What makes relationships work – happily there is not a one-size-fits-all answer. But there are characterstics common to all. This article describes the essential ingredients which make for contented and long lasting relationships. Committed, lifelong relationships are underpinned by kindness and generosity. Read how this works.
Relationship Advice
I work with many couples who come to see me at various stages of crisis in their relationship, so I found a recent blog post on relationship advice from LifeHacker to be pertinent. The problems central to this relationship failure are typical of those which couples bring to relationship counselling. What I particularly like is … Read More
Saving your Relationship – Masters and Disasters
Dr John Gottman has studied couples for over thirty years and has used his research to evolve a particular method of working with couples who are experiencing difficulties in their relationships. You may wish to view this clip, which identifies some of the essential elements which make couple relationships work. This was an out-take of … Read More
Intimacy
The routines of daily life and the attendant stresses and strains often result in couples losing contact. They believe they know all there is to know about one another and simply stop listening and talking to each other; intimacy dwindles away. Intimacy, which is aided by good communication, can be created in simple ways. … Read More
Instances and Exceptions: the times when problems are not so influential
We argue all the time. I’m constantly angry. He never talks. She always criticises. I’m always depressed/anxious/stressed. She/he never contributes. Our lives are always chaotic. We have never been happy and contented. I can’t ever trust him/her again. These are problem statements which come up regularly in therapy. They are statements which many of us use … Read More
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