Debunking 20 common misconceptions about sex

19th July 2014By Deborah SadlerSolutions, Therapy

I have the happy task of sending on this link debunking 20 common misconceptions about sex.  Debunking is often a part of conversations in therapy, since much of therapy is about questioning accepted ‘wisdom’, myths, stereotypes, labels and assumptions.  In daily life they often lead to misunderstanding and make communication between people difficult and stressful. This … Read More

Can Therapy Be Destructive?

7th May 2014By Deborah SadlerChange, Choices, Therapy

Can therapy be destructive?  The short answer to this question is that, under certain circumstances, yes it can . It’s worth bearing the following in mind if you don’t want to come out of therapy with more problems than you had at the start: Any interpretations, analyses and opinions are, ultimately, simply the view of … Read More

The Question Why

31st January 2014By Deborah SadlerSolutions, Therapy

When enquiring about solution-focused therapy some prospective clients worry that this approach will exclude them from understanding why their problems have arisen. Answers to the question why are better left to emerge indirectly, during the quest for solutions, as they then feel less overwhelming and uncontrollable. During solution focused counselling, a skilled SFBT practitioner will ask … Read More

Your Plan – Reality

6th January 2014By Deborah SadlerSolutions, Therapy, Work

  I’m sure many will identify with this cartoon ‘Your plan – Reality’ This may help (I find it indispensible) and is in keeping with a solution-focused philosophy.!rCHMQ Wishing you all a happy and fulfilling new year.      

Slacking online can be productive

6th December 2013By Deborah SadlerChoices, Therapy, Work

Did you know that slacking online can be productive? How great is that? Productivity, slacking, leisure and work are subjects which frequently crop up in therapy in a number of contexts.  They are often accompanied by large dollops of guilt and cries of too much?  too little? obsessive? not enough? To the variously afflicted – … Read More

Saving your Relationship – Masters and Disasters

4th April 2013By Deborah SadlerRelationships, Therapy

Dr John Gottman has studied couples for over thirty years and has used his research to  evolve a particular method of working with couples who are experiencing difficulties in their relationships.  You may wish to view this clip, which identifies some of the essential elements which make couple relationships work.    This was an out-take of … Read More

Solving Problems in Therapy

3rd February 2013By Deborah SadlerSolutions, Therapy

It’s hard to describe how overwhelming a problem can become and how insurmountable it can feel;  you believe you are so completely stuck that  it’s impossible to resolve.  I work with many people who are in that place when they come to see me.   Clients come to see me with a range of different … Read More


11th January 2013By Deborah SadlerChoices, Solutions, Therapy

The main reason, ultimately, for engaging in counselling is to make changes, either to your perspective or changes in patterns of behaviour and interactions with others.  Insight into why you are having difficulties and the opportunity to talk things through can be a useful part of the process and can lead to ideas about what … Read More