Couples come to solution-focused couple counselling often because they feel stuck. Arguments become repetitive and the same old issues raise their heads with monotonous frequency. Past issues can simmer, affecting communication or stopping it altogether. Children, life changes, questions of independence, sex, feeling trapped, family commitments, arguments around expressing emotion, health, affairs, roles, finances, work, and even success, are amongst the many issues which can exert stress on couples and their relationships.
I have worked with many couples – both straight and gay – who have been able to find their way out of the problems which are preventing them from enjoying a more satisfying and fulfilled relationship. Issues may often be similar, but there is no one-size-fits-all. Solution-focused couple counselling gives couples the opportunity to develop a template for resolving their difficulties, which is particular to them, and which they are able to use in their approach should future problems arise.
Alternatively couples may need the time to find out if they still wish to remain in the relationship and, if not, how best to manage things and communicate satisfactorily in the future. Often couples already separated, are experiencing difficulties in communicating and working effectively together towards the shared parenting of their children. Under such circumstances they find it helpful to discuss their issues in a therapeutic setting, which is neutral and where they both have the opportunity to be heard; through discussion under these circumstances they are able to find mutually satisfying solutions.