The main reason, ultimately, for engaging in counselling is to make changes, either to your perspective or changes in patterns of behaviour and interactions with others. Insight into why you are having difficulties and the opportunity to talk things through can be a useful part of the process and can lead to ideas about what … Read More
Solutions
Finding Solutions II
A very Happy Christmas to my clients and to all the visitors to this site. I look forward to working with you in the new year.
Finding Solutions I
Vision
Have you got a clear view of what the ideal outcome would be to your problem? If you’re having problems in your relationship, how would you envisage your ideal relationship; how would you like your interaction with your child/parent to be; what will life look like if you are no longer depressed, anxious or addicted; … Read More
Instances and Exceptions: the times when problems are not so influential
We argue all the time. I’m constantly angry. He never talks. She always criticises. I’m always depressed/anxious/stressed. She/he never contributes. Our lives are always chaotic. We have never been happy and contented. I can’t ever trust him/her again. These are problem statements which come up regularly in therapy. They are statements which many of us use … Read More
Depression and exercise. What’s your view?
You may have picked up on the recent debates in the press on depression and the efficacy of exercise as a cure. If you suffer from depression this could well have piqued your interest (or ire!). Findings cited in a research article published in the BMJ and widely reported in the press on the beneficial … Read More
Tools
When asked what they are seeking from their therapy clients often say that what they want is another perspective on their problems, that they are looking for tools to help them. Describing their goal in this way makes perfect sense. This clearly stated aim shows a determination to solve the problem. In solution-focused therapy clients … Read More
It’s SO Embarrassing – Reflections on attending Therapy
Some clients are embarrassed and ashamed about coming to therapy. They have described their need to seek therapy variously as “weak”, “self-indulgent” or “insane”! Invariably clients come to therapy when they are in crisis or at an impasse in their lives; sometimes they feel ‘co-erced’ into coming by a parent, partner, or agency. Many are … Read More
Work: Who Needs It?
Try to define what work really means to you: a greedy mistress, a familiar ritual, a compelling game, a voracious furnace, a stimulating journey, a necessary evil? Because it can mean any of these things, and contradictory combinations of them, it is no wonder clients often find work a difficult issue to examine in therapy, … Read More
Lists and Records
It’s January again (in case you haven’t noticed) and many of us are scrambling for pen and paper/mouse/ipad/computer/mobile phone/postit note, intent on recording our new year resolutions and by so doing, set some goals to achieve for the year. This list (or record) is a manifestation of our sincere hope to improve our future in … Read More